The holidays are upon us, and with the holidays come family gatherings, tidings of good cheer and food—lots and lots of food. Everywhere one turns there is cocoa and cookies and fruit cake—oh, my!

For some, this time of year, and the many delicacies that come with it, is welcomed. But if you have a child with a food allergy it is a total nightmare.

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t want others to suffer just because my child can’t eat something, but sometimes I wish we celebrated with movies or cards or activities rather than food. It’s something everyone can enjoy rather than be excluded from. As my child has gotten older it’s definitely gotten easier to navigate the holidays in regards to sweats and treats, but it’s certainly not without bumps in the road.

Here are seven simple steps to help you navigate this month (and heck, you’ve already made it through Thanksgiving so pat yourself on the back).

Now, full disclosure, my oldest has celiac disease so should he ingest a food he shouldn’t eat he will not go into anaphylactic shock. I 100% realize that a food allergy is obviously a lot more stressful, to say the least. Still, he reacts with vomiting for 12 hours and no parent I know likes to deal with vomit, and no eight year old I know likes to vomit, so we are vigilant in avoiding gluten. On to the steps:

1. Help. As in, ask for help. You can’t do this alone, so make sure you reach out to the other parents in the class and understand who’s doing what for each holiday get together – this way you can more easily move on to step 2.

2. Outsource. You don’t have to do all of this baking yourself. There are dedicated nut-free bakeries, gluten-free bakeries, and all sorts of amazing bakeries in the city. Use them! They even deliver.

3. Listen to your child. Sometimes he might want to skip an event (if it doesn’t mean skipping school I’m okay with this) or go a little late to miss the cookie-decorating part. If it means avoiding a severe allergic reaction and keeping your kid happy then it’s ok to change up tradition or make your own new ones.

4. Involve your child in creating those new traditions, be it an outing, a food she wants to attempt to make herself that works for her diet, or a new restaurant she wants to try that you know would be safe. Help your child lead the way.

5. Dedicate. Meaning, dedicate a single day to knock out of all your allergy- and diet-friendly baking (so that you can spend the rest of the holiday season prepared and enjoying the season, rather than scrambling). Also dedicate a day to just your child. As in tip No. 4, give your child a day where food is not a thing or an issue that comes up on his radar—just fun and coziness and holiday joy.

6. Alternatives. As in alternatives to food. Our society revolves around food, whether we like it or not, but little by little classrooms and other social gatherings are changing to focus on group get-togethers and crafts rather than just food. Pinterest has a ton of great ideas for things to do at classroom holiday parties that are not food-related, such as tree-decorating contests, snowflake decorating, snowman poofs and even indoor ice skating.

7. Yay! You made it. Now pour yourself a glass of Champagne (or gluten-free, vegan egg nog) and toast 2017!

1. Location – I’m putting this one first because the initial preschool we decided to send my oldest son to was exactly the right school on paper, except it was 3.5 miles from my house. Now, 3.5 miles does not sound very far, but at 8:30am in Chicago rush-hour traffic (even without snow or rain or construction) this is a 25-30 minute commute. My naïve younger self thought this was no big deal. Wrong! This is a huge deal. First of all, getting a toddler out the door is no easy feat in and of itself, never mind his or her younger siblings, then to drive close to half an hour for a two-hour toddler program. No, thank you. Lesson learned. We switched to the preschool we could walk to.
2. Price – School tuition for both the preschool and the elementary years runs the gamut from free to more than some colleges. The tuition-based preschool program for 3- to 5-year-olds via CPS is approximately $14,000 for the year for 2017-18 – for a 10-hour day. If you need that type of coverage during the school year this is an excellent tuition. And, of course, there are many other schools at a lower or higher price point that should work within your budget.
3. Curriculum – This is another area that I had strong opinions about. Although I did want my children in school at age 3, I did not want them sitting at a desk. I wanted a play-based curriculum for them that focused more on having fun and socializing than academics. Of course, this changed for us for elementary school where I wanted them to be pushed academically, but nurtured socially.